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Quit Grabbing My T-Shirt


One of the nicest and most terrible things about life is that each time I think I’m truly at the point where I’ve gotten overloaded and I’m starting to hate all my commitments, something comes along that I truly want to add to the stack. Writing this piece of flash fiction was like that.

It’s my second work for that magical site, The RS 500, the place where writers address each of Rolling Stone‘s Top 500 Albums of All Time with a poem or essay.

This month, I had the honor – and I’m saying that with a true heart – of writing about Eminem’s Slim Shady LP. Although let’s not talk about when it was released because sweet lord, high school was a long time ago when you look at the numbers).

Eminem was a violent genius, furious at his world and lit up by his own tenderness. He felt disconnected from reality and seeing this disconnect when others didn’t made it that much worse. I write about this album, and those feelings, in the context of a long-distance relationship between two lovers – one of whom is deployed overseas.

Check it out: http://www.thers500.com/albums/275-eminem-the-slim-shady-lp-1999/



Stats I’d Like to Know

1. How many other people in the world had “Ridin’ Dirty” stuck in their heads today

2. How many photos a piece of my body has accidentally appeared in

3. How many times my dog and I have exchanged Eskimo kisses

4. How many people are looking out their windows Right.This.Very.Second.Right.Now.

5. How many times Cleopatra REALLY took milk baths

6. How many decibels my loudest screech has been / when I screeched / why I was screeching

7. How many people have a maple leaf tattoo like mine (I know of at least one in the world. Wherever you are, guy from Canada taking your gap year in 2008 and sitting next to me on the train from Seattle to Chicago, I hope you had / are having an awesome life. I both do and do not regret giving you the window seat during the overnight periods.)

8. When the first time I rolled my eyes was, and how many times I’ve done it since

9. How many times I’ve used internet slang (wtf/btw/omg) in real life and how many times I’ve bothered to spell out lengthy or combination words while typing

10. How many times I’ve thought about you vs. how many times you’ve thought about me